Playing With Fire

What is it with men and fire? I don’t mean striking a match and watching it till it burns their fingers. I don’t mean counting the number of times they can run their fingers through a candle flame. I don’t even mean setting paper on fire and holding it till the last possible moment. No, I mean real fire… a brush fire! Men CANNOT resist a pile of brush cleared form a plot of land, just sitting there waiting, asking to be burned!

Picture me in the kitchen doing dishes. My husband comes in, and nonchalantly says, “I think I’ll go ahead and burn that brush pile.” What sparked this desire to ravage the pile? The neighborhood developer is burning brush on several other plots today. Something about the smell of the smoke invokes an innate desire to burn more stuff! It’s encoded in men’s DNA, and futile to try to resist. Just what does the brush pile look like? Well, see for yourself. My husband is the speck with the white shirt on.

Our conversation went like this:

S: Are you sure you can burn a pile that big safely?
J: Yeah, it’s not really that big.”
S: Still, why don’t we just split it up and burn it each time we have a campfire?
J: That would take too long. (Translation: it’s not as much fun. growl, growl)
S: I’m just not sure we should burn that big of a pile near the house.
J: It’ll be OK, I’ll stand right here with the hose.
S: (in a matter of fact tone) OK, but if the new house burns down, it’s your fault, OK?
J: OK
S: (sneaks back in to get the camera, then sneaks out to take pictures)
J: THIS BETTER NOT SHOW UP ON YOUR BLOG!

Sorry, honey, it’s just such an interesting study of the male psyche. I have to do it for science’s sake!

A few minutes later, the pile looked like this.

Then, this.

That’s him with the little hose standing in front of the TOWERING INFERNO!

Before you get too worried, it died down quickly, my husband got his fire fix, then went to mow the lawn on his new riding lawn mower. (grrrrr) Then, he chopped down two trees with his chainsaw. (grrr grrr) I’m not kidding. Ladies, he’s all man, and he’s all mine!

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What can you squeeze into a week?

We’ll here’s what Hubby and I did since last Tuesday:

• Got the Final Inspection on our new house (barely)
• Taught voice lessons in the house with no power (we did have running water)
• Moved all our junk into said house
• Emptied out the storage unit we’ve had for six months. If we didn’t use it for six months, why do we need it now?
• On the same night, hosted a piano and voice recital with my students at a local auditorium
• Organized the new kitchen, which was quite a job, since I have enough dishes and gadgets to fill three kitchens
• Went through and organized all the girls’ clothes, of which they have enough to clothe all the orphans in a given third world country.
• Realized we have way too much stuff, and we have no idea how we got it all. We might just have another yard sale this summer, or just unload the stuff at the local Goodwill.
• Went to a really good performance of The Music Man at the local High School.
• And… I’ve finally gotten the internet hooked up again. It was weird being so un-connected for a week, but I sure got a lot done!
• What can you squeeze into a week?

I’ll hopefully have more witty and deep-thinking posts now that I’m settled…sort of.

Yes, I still have Grandma’s Feather Bed on my music player from National Apron Day. The playlist site is down!

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Weekend Warriors: How To…

OK, I have this idea, but I’m so new to blogging, I’m not sure if it’s cool or dumb, or if anyone will want to play. It’s called Weekend Warriors: How to….. . Here’s how it works: One Friday a month, I’ll post a “how to” question, and you link to a post on your blog with your ideas, tips or funny stories about the topic. It can be a real helpful tip, or “what not to do,” or an experience you had, etc. I don’t know how to design a button, so you can just link text to my blog, so others can join. Here’s today’s:

Weekend Warriors: How to paint a room with your husband/wife

You thought painting was pretty straight forward, right? Well, as I was painting our new house with my husband, I decided it was a very nuanced process, which can affect your relationship positively, if you follow these simple guidelines.

1. Make sure you involve your spouse in the color-choosing process. Example: “Should we paint one accent wall in this Chocolate Brown, or the whole room?” “Do you like this Taupe, or should we go a half-shade shade lighter?” Get it?

2. Whatever you think you knew about painting, forget it. There is always a better way, and he knows it. Go along, and you’ll save yourself a lot of trouble!

3. Roller lines are the enemy, avoid them at all costs. If you see a line, say,”You are so good at getting these lines, could you do it for me?” That way, it will be his fault if the line is there when the paint dries, and it won’t be a big deal.

4. Ditto for pouring the paint into the tray and moving the paint tray! If you doubt your strength or coordination at all, do not attempt!

5. Using painter’s tape is a sign of weakness! Do not…I repeat…do not suggest he use tape for the edging. He will then feel the need to defend his manhood.

6. Finally, if you don’t like the color, be sure to wait till at least 2 days after the painting is done to tell him. For some reason, men don’t like to be told, right after finishing a project, that you want to change it!” Go figure.

Be sure to sign the Mr. Linky if you post!

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Pictures of Setting the New House

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